Moving On...

Well, have managed to keep from blogging for some time and will be blogging much less often... Just to get thoughts down which will benefit everybody.

So started a more reflective journal at Ponderings.


Yeah.... journals all over the place I know. But hope you enjoy the other one : )

Thanks for reading my thoughts all these years.

Avoiding Ghostly Doings

I went to London today, ostensibly to visit Munyi and Nessie, but also to avoid a Halloween party that was going on today. The idea of dressing up as something evil to celebrate something I didn't even know about seemed a little strange and funny and weird, and the final decision was that I'd rather not.

I had a lovely time walking to the train station after lectures ended unexpectedly early today, my heart free in the knowledge that He'd helped me finish a piece of work (due on Monday) yesterday, the first time I had ever finished something so early beforehand and the most effort I'd put into academia for a long time. I'm so thankful that He's teaching me not to be so last-minute, to put my best into my work. One of the reasons for that is that He's put a really lovely, hardworking girl opposite me, the housemate I'm closest to. We laugh together, share together, scribble away frantically during lectures together; and most of all, she starts assignments way ahead of schedule, which makes me do the same as well, and we pool all the journal articles we find online together. I'm so thankful. I'm confident that we'll both do better than if we'd done things on our own; everyone knows that teamwork gives better results.

Anyway, it was lovely walk to the station, with the usual horses and fields and autumn leaves drifting down - tried to identify some of them - recognised the usual pear, London plane, English oak, turkey oak, liquid amber, and the prettiest sprigs of holly with bright red berries. Many of them I still can't place, though; need to work on those tree identification skills!

I'm so thankful that I managed to attend OCF in London today with Munyi. I didn't think I'd be able to, even though I was thinking about it last night and how lovely it would be to go to OCF. At that moment when I was there I was so glad that I was, instead of wasting my time in a poky little room with drunken witches and vampires and ghostly things. It was encouraging, too, even though people at the back where I was sitting were whispering and chatting away and I actually gathered up courage to shush them! Think they were quite surprised (who's this serious goody-two-shoes girl?)

But the sharing was good. The topic of the day was relationships, and listening to them share I felt so refreshed to be in the presence of like-minded people, people who felt and thought as I did, even though everyone else would see things differently. I realised again that God has a plan for my life, a destiny for me to fulfill which I am walking in even now. I find it amazing that everything has been planned by Him. And I realise that I can miss my destiny through sin and disobedience to God, and I don't want that to happen. I just want to be close to Him, empowered by Him, filled with His joy. I want people to see something different in me, because I know that this may be the only time in their lives they're near a Christian, or this may be the only way God can show them His love - through me.

I had a lovely train ride back as well (though it was late!). It took me about an hour on the train to get back, and Charles Swindoll's beeeeeeewtiful book "Living Above the Level Of Mediocrity" absorbed me a good part of the way.

I had a lovely, lovely day. Thank You for the memories of today and thank You for the warmth of fellowship with You... : ) Thanks for the many, many blessings.

: )

Today we had our third cell group....

The Africans are amazing. So encouraging. So passionate. So ready to share and so fervent. I felt so unworthy to share today's message. I should learn from them.

What a privilege it is to learn from this group of people. I pray that we'll be able to draw close together, encourage each other on this walk...

Creepy Crawlies Abound!

I found a spider THIS BIG crawling into my room.
From ________________________________________________ to














_____________________________________________________

Seriously it was either this big or bigger.

I am definitely not going to do my project on insects. I've seen enough of them to last me a lifetime! And because I'm learning about them (or ecology in general) I haven't the heart to kill them, especially spiders cos they get rid of all the other pests! This is what comes of having a soft heart and studying biology!

Ok, I will stop blogging and start reading my journals.

Be More Focussed Ruthie!

Deciding between a pub crawl and dinner with a Christian friend should be easy, but it's not.

On one hand you want to get to know more people and you think everyone else is making friends faster than you and you're panicking, so you want to go for the pub crawl. On the other hand you would like to spend the night having dinner with someone you like very much, don't know very well, and would like to get to know better.

It should be a pretty clear choice, but it took me half a day to make it, because I still like being popular and I still like doing what everyone else does.

It's not nice to feel yourself out of things.

But I'm slowly learning, and He is slowly teaching me, that to rise above mediocrity means being unafraid to be different. I'm learning to do what I really want to do and be unafraid of standing out. Who's going to follow you if you are following everyone else?

Hopefully, I will get to know the rest of them better sometime, but help me and teach me to listen to Your voice so that I don't misuse the time You've given me...

Counting My Blessings (and Rabbits)

Doing a Masters' is harder work than I thought, especially at this particular campus in Ascot (or more specifically, between Ascot and Sunningdale). If you don't have a bike, you can only go grocery shopping twice a week in the minibus, or if your timetable is too busy, you don't get to go at all which is not too good! It almost drives you mad because it's so isolated and the feeling of claustrophobia you get in here is just incredible. It's miles from anywhere and most of the time you don't see a single human soul!

But this place is definitely pretty. It's set in a park and when I look out of my window in the mornings, I see fields and rabbits and rabbit holes and trees. Walking around the campus I see more rabbits and going to lectures you also see rabbits. Besides these, there are squirrels and the occasional deer. Very different from bustling Leeds with all its shops and people. There are times here when you just don't see anyone about and it's eeriely quiet. I guess because this is a postgraduate campus, everyone is either busy studying or conducting fieldwork or homesick in their rooms!

Last Sunday my prayers were very surprisingly answered when I stumbled on a church in quite a coincidental way and also met some Christians on my campus. I'm so thankful that I met them because amidst the disconcertment of this week that Sunday was the one bright spark in my week! After that a kindly woman from church made lunch for us and that was lovely. We met her two little cats and they were beautiful, proud and aloof just as cats should be. Although this church is small and homely and has been pastorless for two years it suits me just fine. I was praying for a church where I could grow and serve and meet people who would help me grow in Christ and this church fits. It's 20 minutes' walk from here so that isn't too bad. (Need to get a bike.....)

The speaker spoke on discipline helping (AHHHHHHH A LOCUST! A locust in my room!!!! AHHHhhhhhhhh *faint* UGH!!)

(It's still in here somewhere...oh well this is what comes of living in the middle of a jungle)

The speaker spoke on God disciplining us and said that discipline showed that God loved us and that it would result in us sharing in His holiness and righteousness and peace. I remembered that I had been praying that He would make me pure, with a pure heart and pure in speech and mind and action recently. So I definitely wanted to share in his holiness, but I was going "Uh oh" to myself because I definitely didn't want to be disciplined for that...

But this week has been a difficult week, and maybe Him disciplining me. It's the adjustment to a new place. Like I said, the bright spark in the week was going to that little homely church. It's strange attending lectures again, it's pressurising because people here seem so smart, mature and on top of things! However, I'm thankful for the people I've met too, and thankful also for old friends. Above all I wouldn't know what to do if I didn't have Him to talk to. Things can get a bit lonely or disconcerting sometimes but He is the same always. And there's nothing to fear from people, because as long as I am following Him and listening to Him, no other voice really matters does it? Petty things just melt away then.

I'm so aware of my weaknesses still and even more so in the midst of all this readjustment, but I just remember what the preacher said last Sunday about the cracked pot. The cracks in a broken pot allow light to shine through and I hope that people here will see Christ through my weaknesses. Also (in another analogy) the potter will have to crumple up the clay in a misformed pot, melt the pot and mold it into a beautiful new one. The process hurts but the product is beautiful! I will count my blessings and they are innumerable, they are too much to count and I will always praise Him with all my heart. There is a purpose to this and

"it will be ok in the end. If it's not ok, it's not the end."

I won't be blogging so frequently nowadays cos I won't have too much time on my hands now and will need to focus on what's important and my goals for this year (they don't include blogging!) Still, I hope that what's written here will also help you to think about your own life and where you are. No matter how tough things are, give thanks in all things and for all things. And no matter if you think you cannot cope, don't give up. He is beside you, and the cracks in a broken pot are for the light to shine through, and this light is Christ. Take care dear reader.

When Two or Three Are Gathered...

Today our family had a precious time of prayer together before my mother went to bed, and God was faithful and true to what He said: “When two or three are gathered together in my name, there I am in the midst of them.” We prayed for each other and my parents prayed for me and for the year ahead in a new college and in a new place. It was an indescribably beautiful time and although my mom had to go to bed later than usual I hope that she’ll wake up even more refreshed tomorrow.

Of course, the tears will come when you don’t want them to, but they’re nothing to be embarrassed about. :op

Thanks to my parents’ prayers, I had a wonderful year last year. It wasn’t always happy and I think I shed many more tears last year as well as had to face up to a lot more things that He showed me about myself (not pleasant ones)! But it was a year where I learnt a little more about what it means to have a simpler, purer heart, a year when I grew a little more. I really believe that God answers the heartfelt prayers of parents. And because of my parents’ prayers, I have a little more courage to face the unknown with Him by my side. This year will be wonderful as well :o)

Determined..

The previous entry was written in a moody fit when I had been doing my feedback form on China for a few days and still couldn’t get it finished. But I’ve finished it now *phew*. Took a long time though, if you count the dates between the entries.

In “How to Get Better Grades and Have More Fun” by Steve Douglass with Al Janssen, it says, “Even if you don’t solve every problem well, hand in what you’ve done. Of course, do the best you can. But remember that partial credit always beats no credit… So don’t keep turning in your homework late all the time because of your perfectionism.” How relevant to myself, and, I’m sure, to many of you reading this!

If you want to read a book that will really change your life, it’s this book. It’s simple, practical, and powerful. And it comes with a money-back guarantee! This book, and the exam-stress pamphlet (if you want one, just email me, I’ll send you one straight away! I mean the pamphlet, not the book haha) got me through all my major exams from the O-levels onwards, and I can testify that the principles really work!

The basic premise of the book is that 80 percent of the benefit from school comes from doing the right 20 percent of the activity well (the 80/20 rule). Determine the objectives of each class and study for these objectives, cutting out what is superfluous. Listen and think aggressively.

As I go back for my final year, I’m resolving to put in a lot more effort in my studies (and to become again the 80/20 student I was in Secondary School!) than just slacking away like I did the previous three years. If I’m going to be a teacher, I must love what I’m teaching and I must know it like the back of my hand. I want my students to enjoy their classes, not see them as routine. Enthusiasm must be infectious, but it has to stem from actually knowing the material well, and loving it!

As part of my preparation for going back to do postgraduate studies I’ve also been reading Chicken Soup for the College Soul (yeah… a dusty copy from Junior College days). An article said that in an interview of a class of graduates from Harvard thirty years later, the 5% who actually had goals with deadlines had achieved and surpassed their goals while the 80% who had no goals and the 15% who had goals without deadlines had achieved far less. The net worth of the 5% who had goals with deadlines exceeded that of the 95% put together! This shows how powerful goals are.

I’m thankful that a new academic year is starting, with no mistakes in it yet, and that I can write out my goals. I have written them down in my journal and He will help me as I persevere.

I pray that this year His name will be glorified HUGELY, in my friendships, in my studies, in my character. I pray for a pure and clear and simple heart, to be able to appreciate people and to be able to focus on what’s really important in life. This is all I ask for, and for the perseverance to be able to meet and surpass my goals.
This year is going to be a year of growth, and although there’s a pang in my heart at the thought of leaving Singapore again, I know that it will be an adventure.